Reward??

        I know you won't like me, no one does, not even me. A woman is a synonym of sacrifice, patience, wisdom, women have the power of being selfless. That's what i noticed in my mother and that's what made me hate being like her.  Whenever she said that she had to sacrifice for other's  happiness i hated her, you always have a choice to do what you want. I never want to make an excuse for not doing what i want in my life.
        I always wanted my life on my terms, my stupid mother died very soon and living with my dad only, gave me a piece of freedom. It changed when i grew up, i wanted a fancy career no matter how much hard work it takes, being a girl i cared about my self respect so i though he had nothing to worry about,  but he wanted to control my life, he wanted to choose for my career. I did what i wanted, i went against his conservative mind and build my career as a business woman. I got the fancy life i dreamt for.
        It took me half of my life to understand that sacrifice is a gift to yourself. My mother did and she died happy. I didn't and i am living dejected, this guilt eats me every second that i had the choice to live with a smiling father and be happy in his happiness instead i choose this alone dead life, how could i not realize that letting go the dead pleasure for living happiness is not sacrifice it's actually the reward.