River- she said "We were made to make not to destroy"...

       I remember her words " we were made to make, not to destroy." My mother, she is so loving, so beautiful, a typical old woman who always thought me how to love others more than ourselves. She told me that we are strong, we are blessed with the power to create new lives, we have the strength to make or destroy anything, but a real woman never does harm, women are made to make not to destroy, our life is dedicated to others our real strength is to become selfless enough to embellish other's lives. 

        Our relationship was beautiful in the starting, he took care of me, respected me, loved me the way i love him. But then, he changed with time. I know i still have to love him, no matter how hard he hits me. I still have to support him, no matter if he puts a new scar every next day on my beautiful face. No matter how many times he throttles me, i still have to keep praying for him because, mom said that's why we exist for, we live for them. I just hope one day he will understand that he can't live without me, he needs ME more then anything else, other girls can please him but it's only me who can keep him happy forever. I just hope he will value me before it's too late. 

        My name is 'River', he calls me with different names 'Forest', 'Mountain', 'Ocen' and many more, his favorite name of calling me is "Nature". My mother is 'Earth' who always inspires me to continue this relationship. He is 'Human', and no matter how much he hurts me i still love him and i'll keep loving him because that's why i exist for, to love others. 

Just one question :Do we really deserves her?

The cup of love...

  

        "I don't wanna sound cheesy, but i can't hold it. I am so amused, you look even prettier then her, and how you got magic in your hands? i never knew a plain cup of tea can taste this good." Ray's word made me chuckle."It's not a cup of tea it's the cup of love"said Maya with her little laughs. 

       "This is there THING you know." she added. I studied Ray's questioned face. "It was an online relationship for years. So, when he finally asked me for a date, i went so nervous. After a long flight and 3 hours of makeover i was ready with all fancy look. To my surprise he stopped the car in the mid of a semi forest asking if i can make him some tea? He helped me with all that stuff and i made almost 1 liter tea." I did a little chuckle and continued."We talked on that car bonnet for hours and then he asked me if i can do this everyday for him and i said yes. So, here i am still keeping my promise." Just when I finished with a smile, my bebe entered there. 

        "Papa!!!!" Maya went to hug her dad.He kissed her forehead back. "Janeman!! Where is my tea?" he asked me. I rolled my eyes and poured him some too, on which he blew a kiss towards me. "Man!! You embarrass me one more time in front of my would be son in law, and i am leaving you." I said faking some anger.An instant disappointment took over his face. Awwww!!! My poor husband, i smiled at him to bring that smile back on his face,which obviously worked." I love you " he said. 

       " I promise you, i'll give you the same surrounding you grew up in."  Ray promised my daughter love, and i just kept admiring all of them. 

        

Does my gain worth my lose?

        " You know that i have always loved you more than anything else, i'll sacrifice my life smiling for your goods. We are best friends from our birth, i see through your eyes too, then why it makes me selfish when i feel the same way you do? Why does your love draws a line on our love? 

        You said you can't share your husband with me, but it was about sharing the love we had for each other. Nothing was wrong when our love was within the line, but we can't control love, we can't decide when to stop, yes we felt for each other but that does not mean that we stopped loving you instead, our mutual love for you brought us closer. 'thing doesn't work like that' because society doesn't accept that, but from when we started caring about society? It was me there for you when you had panic attacks not a random guy from society. You asked him to make a choice and we both will probably give up on our lives before giving up on you. You always said LOVING a soul gives a new life but you never told that loving two souls ends the life. "

       

        This was the last message i got from her. Yes, i have a beautiful loving family, but everyday when i see her picture i feel like my gain doesn't worth my lose. I love her, but did i really had a choice then? 

        

      

The DREAM i LIVED - not all the dreams have to be fancy.

        "mom, I need this makeup palette" i asked my mother with a puppy look. She sat beside me to take a look on my wishlist. "4k! that's pretty expensive han!" she said raising one eyebrow to me. "mom please i have to buy a book too, or i would have bought it by myself, mom pleeeeeeeease" i tried one more time. She gave me a stop this emotional torture look. "please" i know this gonna work. "only if you promise no more orders this month" she replied. I gave her my best smile, "annnnnhhh!!!! I love you mamma" i kissed her cheek. 

         "hey Bulbul ! Wanna hangout?" asked Prakash standing on the door. "No, i don't hang out with jerks" i replied rudely and went back to my laptop. "What's the matter? a big fight or something?" mom asked me. "He is a real jerk mamma, i don't wanna hang out with him" i replied in a sad voice. "that's all right baby" she said hugging me tight. "coffee?" she offered. I smiled at her, yeah! i need a coffee this moment. 

        My eyes popped open, my heart racing like a horse, pin drop silence around, i can literally hear my own breath. It took me good 40 seconds to understand the real situation. I let a sigh, grabbing the photo frame from the bed stand i got up. I started stepping to the garden . Sitting on the grass i looked at the frame, my beautiful smiling mother! A small smile arched on my lips. I lied my cheek on the fame "i wish i could live my dream a bit more" a teardrop fell on the frame. "I love you mamma" i said kissing the frame.